Suck it up
by zabchan
Summary: What would happen if Miroku accidentally absorbed a Shikon jewel fragment into his cursed hand? Rating for Inuyasha's mouth, as always, but maybe for other things later. evil grin
1. Bats in the Belfry

Suck it up

By Zab

Disclaimer: you'd think that, by merely having the word there, lawyers would be content, but noooo, I gotta explain how I don't own Inuyasha, Rumiko Takahashi does, despite what my head people tell me. But I do own a very nice toy Tetsuiga that I will use on people who read and don't review!

The sun was setting, painting the rice stalks with a dramatic golden light and making the shallow pools glimmer like the faint stars that had _just_ come into view.

A view that was suddenly blocked by four gruesomely dark shapes.

Kagome was the first to notice of course, her abnormal sensitivities sending a cold twinge down her spine, accompanied by a not-quite-unpleasant tingle in her temples.

"Demons..." she warned her odd little gang of friends who, up till now, had been enjoying (except for Inuyasha, who had been annoyed by,) the reasonably uneventful day.

Not any more.

"And they have jewel shards!" she realized, assessing the tingle she'd felt. "Two, no three of them!"

Inuyasha whirled and locked himself into a battle stance, the Fang out.

"Let 'um come." He grinned, eager for some $$-kicking action. "Tetsuiaga's been getting 'little lonely with out some blood on its blade!" The fur on its hilt flared, as if in agreement with its violent master.

Sango raised her boomerang and her eyes toward the quickly approaching black shadows.

"Are you sure Kagome-chan? They look just like ordinary..."

"...bats." Miroku finished, unwrapping the rosary from his accursed hand.

"Youkai bats." Inuyasha confirmed. "Gah, I can smell 'um from here. Smell like crap, crap and more crap." He snorted, as if trying to rid himself of the stench.

The demon bats were fully into view now, pug nosed faces twisting into fang dominated grins.

Their great dragonish wings extended from the center of their spines, huge muscle-lined contraptions, while their more human-esk arms hung limply from their sides, as if nature had only awarded them enough muscle for two limbs out of three. Each wing had a sickle-like claw in top while the vestal 'fingers' spread and where connected by yards upon yards of leathery membrane. At the ends of these 'fingers' were tiny sharp diamond-like claws that glittered faintly when the sun hit them just right. As the wings pumped they gave an odd sound that sounded familiar to Kagome, who at first couldn't place it.

_That thwup sound-_ she puzzled, drawing an arrow from its quiver. _It reminds me of... those stupid paper noisemakers!_ The thought seemed totally out of place here but she couldn't help but conjure up a mental image of folded notebook paper in the hands of school-kid bullies. Bringing their arms down and snapping their wrists near sleeping student's ears, the paper would flare and produce a particularly annoying thu-pop!

Fortunately for Kagome's sanity, the sound was infrequent, as these beasts seemed to be better adapted to gliding than the continuous flapping motion of say, a goose. But even so, it was frequent enough to be grating on Kagome's nerves.

As they approached she could make out their features and the result was...well they were no Sesshomaru, let's put it that way.

The largest one sneered with a twinkle in its beady little eyes set in a misshapen face.

"The pri-eeeeeestess and her pet hanyou, how c-eeeeeeute." It eeeeee'd most unpleasantly, screeching like a blade against hard rock. "And a ki-eeeeeeeeee-t-eeeee," it said, referring to Kirara, recently transformed to a giant sabrecat. The jewel embedded in the bat's forehead shone brilliantly against its grime-caked black fur.

The second largest, who was wearing huge wooden sandals it had probably stolen off its last meal sqwee'd in agreement.

"Look at the deeeeeemon slayer with her bone!" It laughed shrilly, "Weeeeee aren't like your li-eeeeeetle dogg-eeee, waiting to play fetch!"

The other two bats were identical, right from their bare feet to their flapping triangular ears. Their squealing laugh was identically eardrum bursting as well. All four demons had greenish white patches on their ragged clothing that Kagome suspected was guano...in other words...

"Bat shit." Inuyasha wrinkled his nose and flattened his ears at their screechy laughter. "These idiots are covered in bat shit."

Not quite how Kagome would have put it but...yeah.

Then suddenly they were upon them, beating their wings and swiping at the group all while chattering shrilly and snapping their dagger-like fangs. The talons on their feet were small but amazingly sharp, and only Inuyasha's fire rat clothes were saved from at least some tattering.

Kagome cocked her bow, shooting arrows crazily while simultaneously trying to avoid the needlepoint claws. The demon above her screeched and dodged in and out of range. Kagome was soon on her last arrow, with nothing to show for it but a few minor holes in the creature's wing membrane as they passed harmlessly through. The bat, sensing her lack of firepower, dove again, aiming for either the Shikon shards or Kagome's throat, both with equally disastrous results. Either way it didn't matter and Kagome desperately jabbed her last arrow blindly upwards.

Amazingly, it caught the bat's wing as it was gliding past. With a hideous ripping sound, the wing membrane was horribly torn, and the demon crashed unbalanced into the mud of the rice field.

Kagome glanced over at how well her friends were doing with their bats. Inuyasha had cleaved his in two, although it had taken him longer than usual to defeat such a low-class youkai. This was because, in Inuyasha's words, the damn thing wouldn't stay the hell still, it kept flitting about and screeching at his sensitive ears and of course, the smell was driving his nuts. Nevertheless, the hanyou had ended his fight and was keeping a careful eye on the corpse, trying to determine on his own which part was regenerating with the help of the Shikon shard.

Sango and Kirara had had the unfortunate task of taking on the leader who was as fast as he was ugly. Kirara has gotten a good many nasty swipes on the youkai, however. Its dodges weren't quite so lightiningly fast, and Sango was quickly tiring it out with well-aimed throws of Hiraikotsu.

Kagome turned back to her own youkai bat and saw the blue-green flare of Shippo's fox-fire. The bat lay burned and dead, a little dagger it its throat that Kagome suspected was stolen.

"Shippo?" she said, pleasantly surprised. "Did you do this?"

"Yeah." The little kitsune blushed, but kept a small proud smile on his face. "He was injured anyway, 'cause of you, but I thought I'd finish him off for you."

"Heh." Scoffed Inuyasha, ambling up behind Kagome, tossing the jewel shard in his hand up and catching it in a relaxed casual gesture, "Kagome did all the work, twerp. You just flamed it a little to make up your cowardice earlier." Inuyasha held out the fragment out to Kagome, who bottled it automatically. Shippo glowered at him, but the surly half-dog ignored him.

Sango came up with her shard too. "It was almost too easy to defeat this batch," she threw down her boomerang and stretched, working the kinks out of her shoulder, "They even came to us this time."

"Keh, the Shikon shards increase demonic power, not brains. These baka just got greedy." He prodded the bat's remains. "And stupid." He added.

Suddenly Miroku appeared directly behind Inuyasha, startling the hanyou, who then instantly started pretending he hadn't been.

"Feh. And where have you been?" he demanded gruffly, "Picking off the easy shardless one while watching us perform for you?"

"Unlike you Inuyasha, beasts of the air do not usually merit any difficulty for me." He grinned slightly, indicating his sealed hand. "And you seemed to have dealt with your opponents just as easily, so you have nothing to complain about."

Suddenly, Kagome gasped, turning white as she looked over the carbonized body of the demon she and Shippo had taken care of.

"What?" Inuyasha asked, leaning over her, hands folded into his sleeves.

"The shards...." She whispered, "...there were three."

"So?!"

She turned her pale face to Miroku.

"One from Sango, one from Inuyasha...and this one didn't have one..." her voice wavered.

"That means..."

"I'LL RIP HIS GODDAMN ARM OFF!" Inuyasha raged, "HE SUCKED UP MY FUCKING JEWEL SHARD!!!!"

AN: First chapter done! I'll write more if there's any reviews. It has begun....


	2. More than he can handle

Chapter two: more than he could handle.

Disclaimer: see chapter one.

"Now, now, Inuyasha, don't do anything rash..."

"DON'T TRY AND PROTECT HIM DAMMIT." His claws flexed menacingly, flashing silver in the fading sunlight.

"Ano...Inuyasha...you aren't really going to try and..." Suddenly Miroku paused in his pleading for his life, standing stock still except for his eyes, which darted nervously back and forth.

He spasmed once. Twice. He sank to his knees, eyes wide and fixed.

Sounds. Everywhere. Sound! Miroku heard insects, buzzing deep in the forest, heard the faint call of water from the stream a mile back. Heard the labored puffs of breath from Kirara, and the ripple of a water-strider in the rice fields. The howling of Kouga's wolf tribe came to him on the wind and he heard Inuyasha's ears twitch. Things his human ears should never be able to hear.

And he heard the pulsing hearts of everyone around him. So much sound!

And he could SMELL. The tracks of all those who had traveled this road before. Peaches, hay, oxen, blood, fish, smoke, humans, demons, straw, dog. Some smells fresh and vivid in his mind, most stale and old. His nose could give him the entire history of an area in less than three breaths. He could almost see the fight he had just been part of unfold under this new and overwhelming source of information. He smelled sweat and blood and bat and guano and even a kind of lack of smell that had come from his kazanna. He could tell you what Kagome had eaten for breakfast, as surely as if it was laid out in front of him. It bordered on the prophetic, and it frightened him.

He looked up at his half concerned; half confused companions (save for Inuyasha who was confused through and through,) and blinked. His eyesight was relatively unchanged, save for the new ability to, with a minimum amount of concentration see miles back down the road, even to the point of watching a monarch butterfly fan its wings perched delicately on a strand of grass. He could count its spots.

His head reeled. So much information to process, too much! He clamped his hands over his ears and doubled over, shutting his eyes tight and moaning.

"Houshi-sama?" He heard Sango say tentatively, touching his shoulder, "What's wrong?"

He sensed her aura without effort, merely through that whisp of a touch. It was a shifting mesh of purples and pinks, tainted by a dash of yellow. The application came to him automatically, unbidden. She was spiritually sound, but burdened with a rising sense of worry.

Suddenly she jerked her hand back.

"What is it?" Kagome asked, eyes wide.

"Something's.... moving!" she gasped, "Under his skin, it shifted!"

The skin under Miroku's hands, which were clamped over his tormented ears, bubbled. Miroku's eyes grew even wider with fear and dread.

"What the hell? Is it Naraku?"

"How could Naraku infect Houshi-sama through a jewel shard?"

"Unless this isn't the real bouzo..." Inuyasha drew the Tetsuiaga, but the blade that had been a huge curving mass of steel appeared quite diminished. The rusty nicked blade gave off no aura.

"What the hell?" he muttered, "Why won't it transform?" but he was cut off by Miroku's anguished cry.

His ears were stretching, growing wider and traveling up the side of his head with a terrible shifting sound as the anatomy of Miroku's head changed. Inuyasha's own demonic ears twitched in recoil from the revolting sound. Bones shifted, without any magical or mundane antithetic, skin mutated into two long triangular flaps of ear. His gums itched for a moment, then his normally unimpressive human canine teeth sprouted and became sharp. His pupils also shifted, dilating and stretching until he looked at them with strange pointed cat-like eyes.

He collapsed onto his side with a painful whimper, unconscious from the strain of the transformation and sensory overload.

"Damn." commented Inuyasha. "It never hurts when I do it."


	3. Something New

Chapter three: Something New

Disclaimer: you'd think that, by merely having the word there, lawyers would be content, but noooo, I gotta explain how I don't own Inuyasha, Rumiko Takahashi does, despite what my head people tell me. But I do own a very nice toy Tetsuiga that I will use on people who read and don't review! And yes I am putting the same disclaimer up over and over again. Hey, its enough just trying to drag my lazy arse away from my sketch pad to write, and you think I'm gonna come up with creative 'disclaimer's' every time?

After getting over their initial shock and hesitance at Miroku's sudden acquisition of bat ears and fangs, the group began to hurriedly discuss the next course of action.

"Do you think it was intentional?"

"Pah! Not the question right now! I wanna know if he's gonna change any more."

"We don't even know what caused it! Should we go to Kaede-san?"

"She's a Shinto priestess, Miroku's a Buddhist monk, would that affect anything?"

"Would Hadji be of any use?"

"Neh? Hadji?! As if we could find him, the cowardly tenuki bastard."

"HEY!!" piped a small, hereto unnoticed fox. "Ever think about taking him to HIS Kaede?"

Several eyebrows either arched or furrowed.

"I meant his master at the monastery!"

Inuyasha was not to be outdone. "Oh yeah, and where exactly is this monastery? As if YOU know."

"I do! I do! He pointed it out to me once. You were off pestering Kagome in her time and Sango wasn't around!"

Inuyasha huffed. "Well," he said, brushing past Sango, who had slung the monk over her shoulders, "Let's go already, then."

They plodded warily off, going cross-country to the north, forging impromptu paths through the forest whenever Inuyasha got too impatient for the road.

"Damn monk has to go and suck up my jewel shard, and get all creepy and shit, and take us off our damn course and delay the search so we can solve his little 'problem" Inuyasha mumbled not-quite-under his breath. He stole a glance back at Miroku swinging from Sango's armored shoulder. "Hmph. I don't frickin' think it's a 'problem'. Better than completely worthless human ears." His own twitched as if mimicking his thoughts as he cleaved a path through the underbrush with the rusty katana version of Tetsuiga.

Suddenly, Sango gave a great cry of surprise and astonishment and dropped Miroku hurriedly to the ground. He had awakened then, only to close his eyes again and double up with pain.

"Ah, crap, what now?" Inuyasha hurried over to inspect.

The skin on Miroku's back was starting to bubble and swell hideously, as if some rodent was tunneling along his shoulder blades. Then, with a great anguished cry from Miroku, which quickly turned into a scream of writhing pain, two arms ripped out from his back in a great burst of blood and youki.

"What the hell...?" Inuyasha started, but the show wasn't over yet.

The arms were almost human, save that they both possessed at least one extra forearm and elbow. The hands ended in five fingers topped by claws slightly smaller than Inuyasha's. As Miroku was still writhing on the ground, claws had formed on his hands and feet as well, and his screams had subsided into longsuffering moans.

"Let's hurry!" cried Shippo. "It's not far, I can see the roof! His master can help! Let's go!"

Inuyasha stared at Miroku, still very creeped out by the extra set of arms. While time may have been of the essence, he wasn't in any great hurry to pick up the freakish monk on the ground.

Sango decided for him. She once again hefted him across her upper back and shoulders and started jogging toward the shrine. Kagome hopped on Inuyasha's back without a second thought and they sped off after them.

Shippo scampered after them, slightly miffed that he'd been forgotten.

Miroku was tucked safely into the room of his boyhood and the rest of the group sat in a circle around Mushin, Miroku's foster father and priest. He had abandoned his sake cup for now, sobering up quickly at the sight of Miroku's transformed state.

"Now, I'm just a poor old Buddhist monk living out here in the woods," Mushin began, nodding his bald head thoughtfully, "and I'm not much about Shinto magic, but I can tell you the general diagnosis." The group leaned in a bit closer, eager to hear.

"From what I know of the Shikon no Tama, it grants near immortality to those demons who would possess it, no? If Miroku absorbed that bat youkai while it still had the shard in it..." he paused for effect. "Then it's quite possible that the shard is constantly regenerating the demon inside the wind tunnel and thus sustaining it. The problem lies in how the Shikon shard has reacted to Miroku's own spiritual powers. It has, somehow, and for no good reason started a process in which to merge the bat demon it sustains with Miroku himself. In short, turning him into the very youkai he holds within him. However," he cleared his throat dramatically. He was feeling rather pleased with himself, having this many youngsters actually hanging on his every word. "Miroku's own spiritual powers, however, are rejecting the demonic forces tying to overcome him."

"Like oil and water." Piped Kagome.

"In a manner of speaking, yes." Mushin confirmed. "This, of course, is what is keeping the process somewhat delayed, and will, hopefully, keep Miroku's own self intact even with a demon body."

"So, now that we know what is going on..." Sango started hesitantly.

"How do we fix it?" Inuyasha interrupted bluntly.

Mushin crossed his arms and looked very deep in thought. His brow furrowed. Then he sat up.

"Haven't the slightest idea." He stated simply.

Sango sweatdropped, Kagome fell over twitchingly, and Inuyasha gave him a 'no duh' glare. Shippo sighed.

"My guess is find away to remove the shard." Shippo said impatiently. They were really all so dense. It was sad.

Suddenly, a startled cry came from the general vicinity of Miroku's room. Then a series of sickening groans and what sounded like the painful shifting of flesh and bone.

The companions sprang to their feet and ran down the hall; Mushin's round stocky body wattling hurriedly after them.

Mwahaha

AN:

Ha ha ha! Behold! The evil cliffie! I love all of you who give me these detailed reviews! So helpful! And I love those who give short and sweet reviews too, they make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. (And give me bragging rights over my other two friends. (As in, "Hahaha I have more reviews than you! Na na na na na! Joke! Joke! Don't hurt me allychik & aeriol.")


	4. Stretching His Wings

Chapter four: Stretching his wings...

Disclaimer: Oh so very tempting to just cut and paste my old disclaimers....sigh. Don't own him. Want to. Own a toy Tetsuiga. Will use on those who don't review.

The five clustered around the doorframe, all trying to get in at once. Sango wriggled through first and rushed toward the curled up monk. But the sight of the next phase in his transformation stopped her in her tracks.

The fingers on his newly acquired limbs were stretching. They were what had caused the hideous shifting sounds moments before. But it seemed that now they were almost complete in their transition.

Five sets of claws glittered from fingers much too long and thick to properly be recognized as fingers anymore. They spread at grotesque angles from the 'palm' of the arm, like spider limbs. In between each finger and from the index 'finger' to Miroku's shoulder blade tough leathery skin was growing. Mousy brown and veined, the membrane filled the spaces like sailcloth being pulled up a mast. This too made a sound, a rustling sort of ripping noise, that was almost too painful to hear, much less experience.

When all was said and done, stretched to their fullest, they spanned from one end of the room to the other. Each wing was at least as tall as Miroku himself and reminded Kagome of parasailing chutes. Miroku uncurled from his fetal position on the floor. He winced at seeing the wings, reaching up to touch them.

He rose to his feet. Without realizing it, as he stood, the wings folded neatly onto his back. The 'hands' closed, gathering the billowing folds of membrane and locking in place. The wings reached barely higher than his long ears.

He was every inch a Bat Yokai. Kagome's initial thought was that of a gloomy castle in Transylvinia and an image of Miroku proclaiming in a melo-dramatic accent, "I vant to suck your bluuuuud!" she tried to hastily push the thought out of her mind, but it had also brought up another interesting point.

Did bat youkai drink blood?

Miroku realized with a start that his wings had moved with him. He sat down.

The wings unfolded.

He stood up again, hastier than before.

They folded.

Sit. Stretch.

Stand. Fold.

He tried moving them of his own accord now, fascinated. He was completely ignoring the others in the room, he was too transfixed with his new 'toys'. (AN: ah, Men....)

He flexed them, relaxed them, tried moving each finger individually, moved the hand and not the arm, and was generally just having a good ol' time when...

"A-Hem" interrupted the ever-impatient Inuyasha. "Can we get back to the shard already? Or are we gonna just watch the bouzo play with himself?" Kagome shot him a Glare. He ignored it.

"Perhaps the young priestess could try and sense where the shard is in his body? Then we could attempt to...ahem, remove it?" Mushin suggested, hereto unnoticed in the corner. Then, seeing Inuyasha's gleeful expression, Miroku added to his master's statement,

"Without doing damage to my person, if you don't mind."

Inuyasha feh'd. Kagome laced her fingers together and concentrated hard at Miroku.

The tingle was present all right, pounding in her temples. It seemed to center...

She stepped forward, taking Miroku's cursed hand in her own. She cautiously peeled back the cloth and beads.

"Kagome!" Miroku started, trying to jerk his hand back. But he shouldn't have worried.

In his palm was a hole, for sure, but no wind came from it. Kagome held up his arm and looked down it. It was almost as if..._someone had hollowed out his arm._ She stared hard into the darkness, then announced, "I know where it is!"

"Finally." Inuyasha muttered. He started to draw his sword. "This shouldn't take long..."

"Inuyasha! It's at the base of his arm! You'd have to remove the whole thing!"

Inuyasha blinked. "And this...is a problem?" the sword came farther out of it's sheath.

Miroku clutched his threatened limb. "Wait a moment Inuyasha! You're not...?!"

Kagome intervened.

"Inuyasha! If you remove his arm, what happens when the wind tunnel comes back?"

Inuyasha, to Miroku's great relief, let Tetsuiga slide back into the sheath harmlessly.

Kagome continued, not quite sure Inuyasha was convinced.

"Then instead of a cursed arm, he'd have a cursed stump! He couldn't aim a stump! And you couldn't wrap up it up with cloth and a rosary! It would be completely unchecked!"

Inuyasha grumped. "Guess we don't want that then." He relaxed about a millimeter. "So what are we gonna do?"

AN: I'm ending this here 'cause I'm lazy and I need to go to bed. But my stupid brain wouldn't let me sleep until I upload this chappie.


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